4am

Consistently… for the past few weeks Finn is waking us me up at 4 in the morning. Somehow Jon sleeps through it but I am wide awake as soon as the cat gets going meowing and scratching and jumping on furniture and pawing at my feet… sigh.  (the picture is him sleeping… during the day… of course)

What am I learning from this… perhaps that this is what’s going to happen every few hours when the baby is born? Who knows what Finn will do with the baby. I’m imagining it going something like this….

Baby wakes up to eat, baby goes back to sleep, Finn wakes up and wants attention, Baby wakes up to eat and Finn goes back to sleep, baby goes back to sleep, Finn wakes up… etc. etc. Something like the song that never ends…. you know it… this is the song that does not end, it does go on and on my friend… is it in your head yet?

being satisfied

So I am not doing too swell keeping up with this blog lately! Things have been quite busy as we’ve been getting ready for the baby and everything else that goes along with that. Jon has been studying hardcore for the GRE and I’ve been… being supportive!

I learned yet another lesson from Finn tonight… I mean, if my cat teaches me this much just think how much a real live human baby is going to teach me… scary! I usually try to feed Finn dinner about 8:30 at night, any earlier and he won’t make it through the night without meowing, any later and he’ll get really pitiful. So 8:30 it is! He’s gotten very used to this routine and now appears from wherever he has been napping or playing to stand by his food bowl and look up at me with his big eyes at about 7:30. So he’s an hour off… still pretty smart for a kitty don’t cha think? Tonight I told him, “one more hour, you’ve got to wait one more hour” and he did, very calmly and quietly and sweetly. Then at 8:30 I fed him. He took two bites of food and then jumped on the windowsill and started trying to eat the Wandering Jew.

I just don’t get it! He waited so patiently for his yummy Purina Indoor Cat Chow, and then… once it was there in front of him, went off after something else… the houseplant that has been sitting in that same window all day.

How often do I do that though? I wait, sometimes not even patiently, and when I finally get what I wanted (or thought I wanted) I start going after something different that I think I want more than what I just received!  *sigh* I long to be completely satisfied with all that I’ve been blessed with, but not satisfied enough to think that this earth is better than my heavenly home.

chicken in the hand

We have a new strategy for keeping Finn off the counter while we eat…we pull a chair up to the corner of the table between us and set Finn in it. It works like a charm, he just lays down and hangs out while we eat.

Then there was tonight… We grilled chicken tonight and Jon and I sat down to dinner and put Finn between us. Then Jon got the generous idea to give Finn a bit of chicken (I think my husband is going soft on me… he is normally TOTALLY against giving the cat people food…).  He put a little piece in the middle of his palm and set his hand in front of Finn who immediately went crazy! The cat started smelling and licking every one of Jon’s fingers, but he couldn’t seem to make it to the chicken that was just laying in Jon’s hand. We tried this a few more times and though he got a little faster, he always smelled and licked every finger before realizing the chicken was right there in front of him the whole time. 

Its a good lesson for us… how many times does the Lord lay blessings right in front of us, free, delicious gifts just for us… and we are so busy looking for the blessing that we are blinded to what He’s already provided. If we weren’t so frantic we would see it right there in front of us.

Lord, help me to see the many blessings you’ve given me that are right in front of me!

a meowing morning

Jon was in the shower. I was curled up VERY comfortably, smack dab in the middle of the bed, half awake, half asleep and smiling as I felt the baby kicking. ahhhh, this was good. Then I hear it, a soft little “meow” behind me on the bed. “Aww,” I think, “Finn is going to curl up behind me, it doesn’t get much better.” Then it was a little louder, “Meow.”  “I’ll just ignore him,” I tell myself, “he’ll realize I’m still sleeping.” Then, “MEOW.” and finally, “MEOW, MEOW, MEOW!!”

Stinking cat! It’s before 7am, I need to sleep! We have a baby coming soon, I need all the sleep I can get!! But I roll over and grab him and cuddle him and he’s so soft and cute I can’t help but smile.

Is this what it’s like with a baby?… In the middle of night?… Multiple times in the middle of the night?… Will I just smile and hold him or her and totally be unaware of the fact that I’m not getting the sleep I need?… Will it be like that? 

I’m thinking it will be even better…. someone tell me if my expectations are already too high!

lessons from the cat

As may be obvious from the header… we have a cat. His name is Finn. Now that we’re expecting a baby I keep hearing how much we’ll learn about ourselves once the baby is here.  A bit intimidating… considering I feel like I’m already learning a lot about myself from the cat!

Take this morning for example.  Finn sat staring intently out the window. I could just see the wheels turning in his mind, his heart longing for the freedom of the great outdoors (he is strictly an indoor cat due to our living situation, which may come up in a future post).  But then I thought back to yesterday when Jon had started to carry him outside… and the cat went CRAZY! He’s terrified of being outside! We put him on a leash a few times and tried to walk him… disaster! He ran away from the ducks at the pond so fast he almost came out of his harness! But… I digress…

Finn’s (in my opinion obvious) longing for the outdoors and yet his overwhelming fear and dislike of the outdoors when he’s actually there is such a paradox… and incredibly telling of my own heart.  Too often I sit and wish and hope and wonder “what if,” but then when I really get there… it’s not really where I want to be.

I don’t want to be content with my life in the sense that I think this is all there is and it’s enough. No, I long for my heavenly home! But I do want to be content with where I am in life… and if that means sitting and looking out the window on a gray spring day like Finn does… I love it, it’s beautiful.